Paragon Fantasy Wrestling Part 2: New Blood

Paragon Fantasy Wrestling ArenaWe are back with a new installment of Paragon Fantasy Wrestling from Peoria, Illinois.  In our last episode, Ricky Bolero lost his Paragon Elite title match against the reigning champion Clarion, generating a great deal of controversy among fans of the “Urban Cowboy.”  A mysterious individual in a green-and-gold tunic appeared at ringside and distracted Bolero long enough for Clarion to slip brass knuckles on and knock out his challenger with a sneak attack, picking up a cheap victory in the process.  Bolero was taken to a local medical facility where it was determined that he suffered a minor concussion as a result of that attack, effectively taking him out of action this week.  In the meantime, Paragon management, following the old showbiz adage, “The show must go on,” and wanting to insert some “new blood” into the title picture, has decreed that this week’s main event will feature the high-flying Alex Jumper taking on the super heavyweight Fire Sumo for the number one contender spot for the Elite championship.  In addition, the Paragon website has dropped hints in several high-profile articles that the person who ran interference for Clarion last week will have his official debut match as well.


Thursday, October 19- 8:00 P.M.

The Paragon TV show opens with a shot of the inside of the Paragon Fantasy Wrestling Arena in downtown Peoria shrouded in darkness.  The fans gathered here talk among themselves.  The commentators at ringside welcome the viewers watching at home to the show and briefly run down tonight’s card, emphasizing the Alex Jumper vs. Fire Sumo match as the start of a new era in the Paragon Elite title picture.  After half a minute of inky blackness, the lights in the arena come up to reveal the green-and-gold wearing mystery wrestler from last week standing in the middle of the ring.  His tunic is very recognizable, but now the fans also take notice of his bald head, the swirling tribal tattoos encircling his green eyes, and the simple brown sandals he is wearing.  Immediately recognizing last week’s culprit, the fans start booing him before he has even had a chance to speak.  Frustrated by their protests, he shouts back at them, “SILENCE!”  The audience only boos louder.

The man shouts again, “I said silence!”  Again, boos erupt from the crowd.  Struggling to maintain his composure, the man quietly recites a mantra to himself then says to the masses, “Allow me to introduce myself.  My name is Beacon.  I am an old friend of Clarion, and I answered what I thought was a call for assistance last week.  The champion invited me to the show as repayment for a favor I did for him long ago.  I was watching his title match on a backstage monitor.  I thought I saw Clarion give a certain hand signal indicating he was in serious jeopardy and needed help.  I see now that I was sadly mistaken and that my actions caused an unfair result.”  The fans give even more voice to their discontent.  In their minds Beacon is lying and committed a cardinal wrestling sin. 

Beacon continues, “I sincerely apologize to you all, to Paragon management, and most especially to Clarion and Ricky Bolero.  I should have known my place and allowed the match to proceed.  Please forgive me.”  The crowd shouts, “No!”

Beacon shrugs off their protests and says, “Fine, have it your way!  If you will not accept my apology through words, perhaps you will forgive me through action!  Tonight, I will show you my superiority in the ring by defeating three opponents at once, and you will surely be impressed!  Bring them out now!”

A lone spotlight darts to the entrance, signaling the arrival of the three opponents Beacon will face.  The fans groan as they instantly recognize, walking toward the ring as a group, the familiar forms of Hugh, Douglas, and Lulubelle (whose biography on the Paragon website states that his parents had expected a girl and stuck with the name – poor kid).  This trio of undersized wrestling brothers have been with Paragon since the beginning of the promotion, but have never once won a match.  There couldn’t be a more self-serving or one-sided way for Beacon to make an impression than by singlehandedly putting away three of the worst wrestlers in Peoria, let alone the entire country, the world, and possibly even the universe if one was feeling generous.

As soon as all of the match’s participants have sorted themselves out and the referee gives instructions, the bell rings and the contest begins in earnest. Beacon wears green-and-gold trunks and boots and Hugh sports red trunks and boots, while Douglas and Lulubelle, dressed similarly to Hugh but with blue and green color schemes, respectively, wait on the outside edge of the southeast corner for a tag from their brother.  They don’t have long to wait, either.   Beacon tosses Hugh hard into their corner with a mighty heave, and the red-clad brother, winded from the impact of this blow, quickly tags out to Lulubelle.  The brother repeatedly voted “Most Green” by Pro Wrestling Illustrated readers steps gingerly into the ring, only to receive a gigantic kick to the midsection which propels him into the air, only to come down hard after receiving a powerbomb from Beacon.  Lulubelle, having had enough as well, retreats to the corner and tags in Douglas, who by this time is sweating profusely and refuses to get into the ring.  Beacon walks over to the brothers’ corner and pulls Douglas in, then scoops him up, flips him around, and performs a piledriver in the middle of the ring, knocking his opponent unconscious with the meeting of his head and the mat.  Fearing for their lives, Hugh and Lulubelle merely look on as Beacon covers Douglas for the three count and the win.

Beacon grabs a microphone from the ringside announcer and asks the fans, “Are you not entertained?  I gave you the action you craved.  Surely you can forgive me now?”  The crowd boos him just as loudly as they did before the match started.  If they were supposed to be impressed, they clearly showed that they were not.  Beacon tries to get some more words in, but the crowd by this point is protesting too loudly for anything to be picked up by the microphone.  The green-and-gold wrestler gives up, dons his tunic once again, and takes his leave via the entrance ramp.  He appears to be visibly disgusted with the whole affair.  Meanwhile, the commentators inform the viewers at home that Ricky Bolero will return to the program next week and he has promised that he has something special for both Beacon and Clarion to hear.


Thursday, October 19- 9:50 P.M.

The Paragon TV show returns from its final commercial break with an image of Alex Jumper and Fire Sumo standing on opposite sides of the ring.  Jumper is wearing green pants with a stick figure in mid-jump with one arm in the air stenciled onto the back.  Fire Sumo is dressed in dark blue spandex pants with a yellow mawashi belt stretching around his lower half and a stylized flame graphic on his right pantleg.   If there wasn’t a rotund man in those pants, the fans could easily mistake them for the world’s largest present.  Jumper and Sumo are good friends who have often competed together both as a tag team and against each other in singles competition.  The referee knows these two will fight fair, but regardless, he checks both competitors for illegal objects.  Satisfied they are free of contraband,  he signals for the match to begin.

Jumper lays the pressure on Sumo early, upsetting his balance with repeated high kicks.  Sumo attempts to counter with several clotheslines, punches, and other impactful moves that can cover a large surface area, but Jumper dodges each attempt.  Eventually, Sumo appears to have become immune to the pain of the kicks and no longer winces when hit.  He grabs Jumper’s leg as he goes in for another kick and pushes him away, spinning Jumper around as he does so.  He goes for another clothesline and this time manages to knock Jumper down although his opponent gets right back up.  Two more clotheslines and two more recoveries later, Sumo picks up Jumper in a cradle hold and suddenly lets go, dropping Jumper hard onto his back.  Sumo drags Jumper’s limp body over to a corner post and slowly climbs the ropes to the top and readies himself  to drop his large frame onto his helpless opponent.

Jumper, jerking his head around in time to see Sumo dropping toward him, rolls safely away, leaving his opponent to land flat as a pancake on the ring floor.  Jumper gets up and, hopping over to the prone Sumo, kicks him in the back of the head, sending him off to a temporary slumber.  Jumper than ascends to the top of the corner post and launches off it into a shooting star press, turning a full somersault in midair and landing on top of Sumo, knocking the wind out of him.  He lifts Sumo’s massive leg for the cover and, much to the surprise of the crowd and especially Jumper himself, he manages to get a three count and the win after only six minutes of action.

Jumper celebrates a bit with the fans giving high fives to some of the children at ringside.  When Sumo comes to, Jumper heads back into the ring and shakes hands with him showing that there are no hard feelings between the two.  It’s an emotional scene which culminates with Sumo lifting Jumper up on his shoulders as cheers of joy rain down from the fans.  Jumper asks for a microphone which Sumo fetches for him.

“It’s an honor to perform for all of you guys,” Jumper tells the fans.  “Every match is so much fun.  But right now, we’re on a mission.  There’s a guy named Clarion who thinks he’s all high and mighty just because he’s got the title.  Well, I’m here to tell him and all of you that it takes more than gold to be great.  It takes heart, it takes determination, and most important of all, it takes love for everything you do to be great.  I promise you, I’m going to train my hardest to prepare for Clarion, and if I beat him…  No, when I beat him, I’m going to become the new Paragon Elite champion!”  With this thought, Jumper takes in the adulation of the fans, and the show closes with the fans going ballistic for their new top contender.

A commercial for next week’s show plays, stating that there will be a contract signing for Clarion and Alex Jumper’s Elite title match.  If professional wrestling contract signings of the past are any indication, this one will not be any more civil than the others have been.  In addition, a special edition of the interview segment, “The Cannon Ross Exam,” will be held with special guest Beacon.  Cannon Ross, a former professor of broadcasting at the University of Illinois at Chicago, has been known to ask hard questions to the Paragon stars, so there should be some promising revelations about Beacon, his relationship with Clarion, and what he thinks of Ricky Bolero.  Speaking of which, Bolero has promised to show up next week with a special message for Clarion and Beacon.  Will they like what he has to say, or will they be further enraged?


We crowned a new number one contender and introduced some new characters this week.  What did you think of them?  We’ve also got some huge events set up for next week, and even though there weren’t any actual matches mentioned in that commercial at the end, remember that anything can happen in pro wrestling (especially fictional wrestling!), and even the most civil interviews can turn into matches on a dime.  Leave your thoughts in the comments, and stay tuned for next week’s Paragon Fantasy Wrestling!

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